Hartstrings: A Jaded Regret Novel (Jaded Regret Series Book 3) Read online

  “Thank you.” I pulled back and surveyed my band, my team, my family.

  You should talk to them. I knew I should. I’d been part of this band for over five years, yet I’d never gotten personal with them. Maybe once this is all over you can tell them everything. From the beginning.

  “I’ll have AJ get a car and be ready for you in an hour. Okay?” Natalie smiled at me, her hand resting on my arm. “It’ll all be okay.”

  “Thank you.” I didn’t deserve her kindness, but she constantly gave it to me anyway.

  * * *

  I turned on the street where Mackenzie lived. AJ was silent in the seat next to me. We’d made small talk for some of the time, but the closer we’d gotten the harder it had been for me to shoot the shit. I had to figure out what I was going to do. It was late, almost two in the morning. She’d probably be asleep. I knew I was stupid, coming here at this time. Andrew more than likely was here, and he had a gun. I knew he wouldn’t hesitate to shoot me after what I’d done to him in the hotel.

  “What’s the plan?” AJ read my mind. If I had to sit in this car until morning, I would.

  “I don’t know. I need to be here and see for myself that she’s okay.”

  “It’s the middle of the night, bro. You can’t go busting into someone’s house. You’re going to get your ass shot.”

  He was right. “I know. I need to see for myself where she lives. If there are no lights on, I’ll wait.”

  AJ said nothing, just stared out the window as we slowed outside a small house. It was older but well taken care of. The street lights shone on the front porch. Flowers hung from baskets. That had to be Mackenzie’s touch. There was a small one car garage. A nondescript sedan was in the driveway. A flower sticker shone in the back window. Mackenzie’s car. I searched for Andrew’s police cruiser but didn’t see it. It was either in the garage, or he wasn’t here.

  What if he wasn’t here?

  This was my chance. I put the car in park on the side of the road a few houses down from theirs. No lights were on, but that didn’t stop me. I slid my phone out of the holder in the rental car and tapped a few numbers. Pressing the phone to my ear, I waited while it rang. Just when I thought it would go to voicemail, I heard a click.

  “Hello?” Her voice was groggy. I’d woken her up. But I couldn’t stop now. Hearing her voice made relief flood through me so strong that my hands started shaking.

  “Mackenzie.”

  She didn’t answer, but she was still there. I could hear rustling and her sharp intake of breath.

  “It’s Tanner. Are you okay?”

  “How did you get my number?” Her voice was just above a whisper.

  “I’m outside your house. Are you alone?”

  I realized how this sounded. I’d found her number and her house without her telling me anything more than her first name. A laugh bubbled up in my chest. She probably thought she should be afraid of me.

  “Tanner.” The outside lights flicked on, and I saw her shadow at the front window. “W-what are you doing here? Y-you can’t be here.”

  “Is he home?”

  “No. He’s working overnight. I don’t know how you found me, but you need to go.”

  “I woke up this morning and you were gone, Mackenzie. I’ve been worried sick. I could barely make it through my show tonight, worrying about you. I had to come see you. Please, don’t make me leave.”

  “I told you, you shouldn’t worry about me.”

  I snorted. “I cleaned the blood off you, Mackenzie. I saw the bruises on your body.”

  “You don’t know me. You show up here in the middle of the night...”

  I stepped out of the car and crossed the street, leaving AJ staring after me. “Let me in, Mackenzie. Please. I’m sorry I showed up. I know it is weird. But I have to make sure you’re okay.”

  “Tanner. I’m fine. I’m sorry you got involved in this at all, but please don’t cause problems. It’ll only make things worse. You need to forget that you ever saw me. It’s better that way.”

  Better for who? Her? Or me? “I can’t forget I ever saw you, Mac. Please.” I didn’t know where the nickname came from, but it fell out of my mouth like I’d been calling her that all along.

  A small sob resounded over the speaker in my phone. Shit. She was crying?

  “I’m sorry. I’m not trying to upset you. I need to see you and know you are okay.”

  “You called me Mac.” Her voice wavered.

  “I’m sorry. Mackenzie.” I remembered she hated the nickname Andrew gave her.

  I reached the front door and stood there. I knew she could see me. I was bathed in the warm light, and she was shrouded in darkness inside the house.

  “Don’t be sorry. It’s—nice. I haven’t been called that in a long time.” I could hear her voice not only on my phone but through the door.

  “Let me in.” I knew I was begging, but I had to get through to her.

  “He’ll kill me.” The words bounced around my body, igniting fury like I’d never felt before.

  “He’s not going to kill anyone. Trust me.”

  “Tanner.” Her voice was small and quiet. I imagined that her head was pressed against the door where I stood, her hand on the doorknob. “I’ll do nothing but bring you down.”

  “That’s not true. Plus, I’m not leaving until I see you. So it can be now, or I can wait on the porch until Andrew shows up from work.”

  She gasped. I wasn’t sure if it was because she realized I knew his name, too, or because I said I would stay right here until he came home. I would. I’d love to show that piece of shit exactly what I thought of him one more time.

  Before I could beg again, I heard the lock slide and a beep indicating she’d deactivated the house alarm. My stomach lurched and jumped, causing my heartbeat to intensify as I waited for her to open the door. I knew she’d probably look worse than last night; the bruises would’ve deepened and changed color.

  But nothing prepared me for what I saw.

  Mackenzie stood in the open doorway, the light from the porch glowing on her light-blond hair. She wore a thin nightgown with a small robe over it. When she stared at me, I felt rage and protectiveness equally.

  She didn’t have the same bruises.

  She had more. Her eye was puffy and blue, her lip was split, and she was favoring her right arm.

  I reached out my arms to touch her when she grabbed my hand with her left and pulled me inside. She stuck her head out and glanced both ways before shutting it behind her.

  “No one can see you. I can’t have any of my nosy neighbors telling Andrew I had some guy over here in the middle of the night.”

  Some guy.

  She turned and walked through the darkened house. I followed, trying to tame down the visceral reaction I had to seeing her in worse shape than before. The desire to grab her and throw her into the car with me and AJ was so strong, I had to force myself not to do it.

  Mackenzie flipped a light on in the back of the house and turned to face me.

  “I’m okay.” She crossed her arms in front of her body like she was shielding me. I knew it wasn’t from seeing her body since I’d seen that last night. That meant she was keeping me from seeing something else.

  “You are not.” The words were nothing more than a growl. “What else did he do to you, Mac?”

  Her eyes widened again at the nickname, but it flowed from my lips easily now. She was Mac to me. The silence stretched between us as she regarded me. She studied my face, the rigid posture of my body, my clenched hands, and backed up.

  “I don’t want to tell you.”

  The urge to haul her into my arms and bury my face in her neck came on so strong I had to force myself to take a step back to stop it. What the hell, Tanner? You aren’t here to get a girl. You’re here to save her life.

  “I can tell he hurt you again. Why do you go back to him?” It was the only thing I could think to ask her that didn’t betray the emotion coursing throug
h my body.

  She glanced away from me, settling herself gingerly in the chair at the table. I watched her body try to settle, and it only enraged me more.

  “Do you love him?” I wasn’t going to stop until she gave me some answers.

  “It’s complicated.” That wasn’t much of an answer, but what I expected.

  “That’s not a reason to stay with someone who hurts you.”

  “You don’t understand.” She didn’t meet my gaze, twisting her hair with a finger.

  I fucking understand more than you know.

  “Make me understand, Mac. I need to hear you explain it.”

  Her lip wobbled. “Why do you care, Tanner? Why are you here?”

  Because I can’t be responsible for standing by while I know this is happening. Stranger or not, I know now. And I can’t let someone else die at the hands of someone who “loves them.”

  Instead of answering, I pulled out a chair and sat down next to her. We were so close my knees touched hers. Before I could stop myself, I put my hands on her legs, and she lifted her face so we watched one another. I could barely make out the blue in her swollen eye. The bruises on her neck were more pronounced, as well as the ones on her face. I couldn’t see the cut on her head because of her hair, but I knew it was there. I knew there was no way in hell she would be going anywhere for a long time in that condition.

  “When you sat down, you acted like you were in pain. If you were to take off this nightgown, what would I see?”

  Tears immediately began to form in her eyes. Why the hell did this beautiful woman think this was what she deserved?

  “Tanner.” Her hand came up to her mouth, and she shook her head. “I don’t understand. Here you are, this handsome and successful guy, trying to find me. Why? So you saw Andrew and me having a fight at the hotel. Why are you here?”

  “A fight? That’s what you call this?” I shoved the chair back, the scraping of the chair on the tile echoing throughout the room. I ran my hands through my hair as I paced the small space, wondering what the hell I was doing. I was completely out of my element here. I could feel her gaze on me as I moved back and forth. “You asked me why I’m here. Why I care. Because people should care, Mackenzie. I can’t forget that I wiped the blood from your head and listened to you cry. Or that I saw the bruises on your neck from being choked. Real men can’t forget that.” I indicated around us. “While you’re here in his house, waiting for him to come home and beat you again. For what? For not having his food ready, or the house clean enough? For not sucking his dick good enough? This is no way to live!”

  I was angry, but not at her. I wanted to kill Andrew for beating her down both physically and emotionally, so much so that she couldn’t see what it had done to her. I stopped and crouched down in front of her. If only someone would’ve cared enough to save my mother before she had children and got locked into being with my dad, she may still be here now.

  Tears tracked down her cheeks and dripped onto her bare legs. Without saying a word, she stood and shrugged off her robe, still favoring her arm. I followed, standing up to my full height while I took in what I saw. Bright red marks covered her upper arm. She turned and dropped the sleeve of her gown so I could see her back. Angry welts covered her back, and dried blood spotted the fabric. I gasped at the weeping wounds.

  “I think my arm is broken.” She turned back, her watery eyes meeting mine again.

  “Let me take you to the hospital.” My fingers reached out and grabbed her other hand, squeezing gently. “Please, Mackenzie. Press charges. Let them take pictures of your injuries. What did he hit you with?”

  “A belt.” I had to strain to hear her, she said it so softly. “And his fists.”

  “Because of me?” Guilt fell like a rock into my stomach. He’d hurt her because I’d gotten involved.

  “Yes. It was the only way to keep him from coming after you. Once I left your room and went back to ours, I had nothing else I could tell him about where I’d been except the truth. I was wearing your clothes and I’d been gone all night…”

  I pulled her into my body gently as to not hurt her. “I’m sorry, Mackenzie. Please come with me. You should’ve never gone back to him. Not this time and not ever again.”

  She leaned her head against my chest, and I pressed a soft kiss to her head. I was afraid to wrap my arms around her for fear of causing more pain. “He doesn’t deserve you.”

  She shook her head. “It’s not that easy.”

  “What isn’t easy?” I leaned back so I could survey her face again. “Walk. Away. I’ll take you right now to the ER, and they will document everything. I’ll take you to the courthouse when they open and file a restraining order. You don’t have to live like this.”

  Mackenzie stepped back from me and shifted her gaze over to the clock. It was almost three now. “I can’t.”

  “Why? Help me understand this.”

  “He knows people everywhere. He’ll never let me get away with that.” She picked up the robe and attempted to put it back on. Sweat dotted on her forehead and her face went stark white as she tried to put it on her broken arm.

  “If your arm is broken, you need to get it casted.”

  “It’s not the first time. I’ll be okay in a few days.”

  This woman completely infuriated me. “Are you serious? You aren’t going to stop this from happening?” I thought about AJ saying she was a PI with her family’s company. “Does your family know about this?”

  Fear flickered across her face. “No.”

  “You’ve been with this guy for years, and none of them know he beats you? How do you go to work?”

  “You found out all about me, didn’t you?”

  “You didn’t give me much choice.”

  “You could’ve gone on with your life and forgotten you ever met me.”

  “Forget that I had you in my bathtub, washing blood out of your hair? Or that you wore my clothes and slept in my bed? Forget?”

  She sighed. “I don’t go to work until there’s no marks.”

  “So you miss work for a few days every week?”

  “No. It’s not always…this bad. He knows how to…” Her voice trailed off.

  “He knows how to hurt you so they can’t see.” I finished her sentence. I swore if someone took my blood pressure right now I’d be close to a stroke.

  “You have this bad boy image.” Mackenzie lifted her good arm and touched my face. “But it’s not true. I’ve read all about you, too.”

  “Don’t believe everything you read. But you know what you should believe? That your boyfriend is an asshole who should be locked up. Does he have something on you? Is he threatening your family? There has to be a reason.” I stopped to glance around the small house. “You don’t have children, do you?” God, please.

  “No. I’d never have children.” I didn’t miss that she hadn’t answered my other questions. She was good at deflecting.

  Relief coursed through my body. “So I can’t convince you to leave?”

  “I…” Mackenzie glanced away. “I can’t yet.”

  “Yet? So you’ll think about it?” I lifted her chin so she looked into my eyes. “I’ll help you. I promise.”

  “I don’t know what I ever did to deserve your kindness, Tanner.”

  “Everyone deserves kindness, Mac. You just haven’t been allowed to see that.”

  “I want to leave but I don’t know how.”

  I wanted to cheer in triumph, but I tampered down the feeling. “You could start with going to the ER right now.” I knew she wouldn’t.

  “I can’t, Tanner. I know you don’t understand it, and someday, maybe I’ll tell you the whole thing. But know this: I’ll find a way out. It can’t be right now.”

  And hopefully before he kills you. “Promise me something.” She waited for me to continue but didn’t speak. “I want you to call or text me every single day. I’ll be on tour, but when I get back…I want to see you. I want to know your plan. Please
.”

  “You want to talk to me while you’re on tour?”

  “Yes.”

  “Why me, Tanner? I’m no one.”

  “Mackenzie. Promise me.”

  “I promise.” A small smile played on her lips. I’d done that for her.

  “One more thing.”

  She sighed. “Okay.”

  “If he does this again, I’m flying from wherever I am and taking you out of this situation. I can’t… I won’t…”

  Mackenzie pressed her lips against my cheek, and I froze, my thoughts immediately shifting beyond anything I should be thinking. “Thank you, Tanner.” She stepped back, and I sucked in a breath.

  “Can I put something on your back for you? Do you have gauze?”

  “No. If he sees…”

  Oh, right. There was no way she could put gauze on her own back, so that wouldn’t fly.

  “You probably should go. Thank you for coming all the way here. For finding me. No one has ever cared that much about me.”

  No one? I wanted to know everything about her story. What made her tick? Why had she stayed with Andrew all these years? Why was she a PI when she couldn’t help herself? Did she not have any friends who saw this pattern?

  I kissed her hand. “Please take care of yourself. I know you won’t listen, but you do need to get your arm seen by a doctor. Tell them you tripped or something.”

  “I’ll call or text you.”

  I nodded, turning to head for the door. Just before I opened it, I turned back to her. She now stood behind me, the light from outside shining on her flawless complexion. Bruises or not, she was still the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. Before I could stop myself, I leaned over and brushed my lips against her cheek.

  “Remember this.” I tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “You are worth so much more than the way he treats you. I know you don’t believe that, but it’s truer than anything else I could say to you.”

  Chapter Four

  Tanner

  “Hey, baby.” The redhead that had been scoping me out slid her way into my lap. “I threw my bra at you tonight. It was the red one with sequins so that you could remember my red hair after tonight.”